Goin' the the Chapel?
by Acute Delirium
Summary: Logan asks Veronica a question she isn't prepared to answer. Set sometime is season three.


**Goin' to the Chapel?**

"Do you want to get married?"

Veronica looked up sharply from her laptop. Logan stood shirtless in his bedroom door looking at her expectantly. She had been trying to type her term paper quietly on the couch in Logan's suite because it was early. Well, 10:00. Late for her, but early for Logan.

"Do you?" he repeated insistently when Veronica didn't respond. His face was serious, and it caught Veronica off guard. When Logan looked serious, it usually meant that he was angry. She was so used to him smirking, and occasionally full on grinning, that the steadiness she saw was unsettling.

Veronica forced a playful smile on her face. "I think we should at least eat breakfast before skipping off to the chapel."

Logan smirked, and the man she was used to was back. "Relax. I'm not suggesting we elope before our afternoon classes." He skipped over to the couch and closed her laptop. Used to Logan's occasional skipping, Veronica didn't even comment. Some people did a double take when Logan began gesturing wildly or hopping, but Veronica knew it was just part of the playfulness he tried to keep hidden.

He sat down next to her and put his arm up on the back of the couch. "I mean, you know. When you're done with your spy training or whatever it is you want to do. And I'm done getting a degree in…you know. Whatever. Do you want to get married?"

Veronica smiled and made a vague noise. What did she want to do? On one hand, for the past few months strangely serene fantasies had invaded her mind when she was with Logan. Fantasies of a light blue house far away from Neptune. A house like the one she had lived in before everything had fallen apart in her life. Sometimes she even allowed her thoughts to stray to light haired children. Children whose mother didn't leave them. Whose father didn't sleep with every woman he met. But Veronica never let herself get lost in those thoughts for too long. They were the fantasies of a girl who had never faced hardship. Who had lived a blessed life.

She wasn't that girl anymore. Every time she thought about the light blue house, the light haired children, a voice in her reminded of her vow. Her vow to never get married. After all, her entire life she had seen people betray one another. Her father's clients, her friend's parents and even her own mother. Marriages were designed to fall apart.

But Veronica didn't want to say this to Logan. "Do you?" she replied, trying to avoid having to say anything herself.

Logan shrugged. "Well yeah. I love you." Something in Veronica sent tingles to every nerve every single time Logan said that. He loved her. Suddenly Logan's face changed and a flash of insecurity passed over it. "Do you love me?"

"Of course!" Veronica said hurriedly. "I just didn't know you were thinking about this."

For a second he was silent. Logan stared at the couch. "Not really. I just wanted to see what you thought." But it was clear he was lying. Should she tell him she had been thinking about it too? Or should she tell him about her vow. Her vow to never marry. Either answer would change their relationship. She knew that for sure.

So she took the middle road. "I have thought about it. More than once." Her she chose her words carefully. "But we haven't exactly had the best role models in that respect."

Suddenly a wall came over Logan's face. In one swift move he was up and had backed away from her. "So you're thinking the apple doesn't fall far from the tree huh? I'm doomed to cheat on you? Hit your kid? Is that what you're thinking?" With that he turned around and went back to the bedroom, knocking a lamp over on his way. Veronica ran after him. She was trying so hard not to upset him with her answer. But she should have known better than to bring his parents into this.

Inside the bedroom Logan was violently pulling on a tee shirt. "Or maybe it's not even _that _role model your thinking about," he went on. He yanked on the hem of his shirt. "Maybe you're afraid I'm going to go crazy. Abandon you. Leave you right when you need me the most."

Veronica had never heard him talk about his mother that way. Ever since she died, his rare words about her were said with love. Privately she thought that Lynn was selfish for leaving Logan. She knew a thing or two about losing your mother and it sucked, no matter how it happened. But there was nothing more horrible than knowing your parent didn't love you enough to stay.

And she had to make sure Logan knew she didn't think he was that selfish. Still submerged in his fit of anger, Logan was still pulling on his shirt like a frustrated toddler. Slowly, Veronica walked up to him and pulled his hand into hers. It seemed as though her action made his anger evaporate. He looked at her, and her heart sank to see the sorrow in his eyes.

"How could you think I'm like them?" he whispered, "I would never do what they did. I would never do that to you."

Smiling, Veronica reached up to put her hands on his face. "I know. I know. It's not you I'm worried about," she tried to convince him, as well as herself. "It's me. How do I know I'm not going to end up like her? I don't know if I'm built to be a wife. I'm too selfish. I turn on people in an instant." It was the first time she had said the words out loud, but in an instant she knew it was true.

Logan's eyes softened and he kissed her. It was a quick kiss, one that conveyed simple love and reassurance. "You could never be like her. And you aren't selfish. Now can we forget I ever brought this up?"

"I can do that."

They had both lied. And they both knew it.

* * *

**AN: **Anyone who has read my work before knows I dip heavily into the angst. So I tried to make this one fluffy. But you go back to what you know right? Please review! I return the favor :)


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